[Their similar stories despite the eras and classes that they grew up in was part of what attracted him to Richard. The younger man had overcome so much, fought so hard, sought after a seemingly impossible dream. Just like him. They had both been born in the darkness, though his own had come with little fanfare but it remained a truth that it was shocking both of them had survived infancy and childhood given the environment. They had been weak, supported by stronger men through and then learned the hard way to find their own feet.
It was a fact that neither one of them could entirely trust again. There was too much background, too many slights and betrayals, so they had to focus forward on their goals. In this way, Silco had always felt a connection to Richard that he hadn't felt with anyone else, not even his own daughter.
Yet his gaze moved from watching the back of Richard's head to look across the altar with all its little decorations and candles bathing the place in light. His fingers dragged over the spot between his lover's shoulder blades, and he considered the tale being woven for him. It was more details that he supposed he had given about his own lover.]
What betrayal did this person do against your person to provoke such a response? This is supposed to be a holy place according to you, and you killed a man under the eye of your God. That's... bold.
[He knew what it was like though, to wish to repeat that moment over and over again, to claim the victory and prove everyone who thought they could be redeemed or brought to heel wrong. He had drive the knife into Vander's back and then front, had looked into those gray eyes and felt a momentary heat when he knew that he had won, that he had overcome a greater enemy and completed his transformation to something more. No longer would he be that dirty little thing of the undercity.
Yet, he sighed from his nose as the same old tale was spoken of. He'd seen the crown and hadn't thought much of it, but he could tell that Richard was drive to achieve that.] And will you bring about a Hell to those that prevented and stood in your path from achieving this golden light? It seems to me that the higher in the political world one ventures, the more inherent dangers there are, but these knives are cloaked behind smiles and ambition. It seems you might be happy but walking into a larger fight at the same time.
[There was no denying the similarities between their stories. Silco might as well be the one person he shares the most common ground with. They were both power hungry and ruthless, stopping at nothing to achieve their goals and resist the destiny. They were the wolf in sheep clothing, hiding in plain sight under shepherd's nose.
Even their journey's followed a similar path. A life overshadowed by oppressive power, choking them out and forcing them in the quiet and resigned role determined for them by nation. They both had found a dream -- which only was stolen away by a betrayal, leaving behind only a husk, a shadow of their former selves.
And now Silco was asking the story behind the betrayal that happened all those years ago, the event that had killed his previous, weak self. Richard eyes were focused on the altar, mind revisiting that evening. But strangely enough, he felt nothing. No panic, fear or pain -- just a distant recollection.]
..He called me a demon. [He answers after a brief silence. That's right, Henry had seen him for who he was and failed to love him. He had murdered his heart and Richard took his life. It had been inevitable.
Richard then turned his head to look into his lover's eyes, his own expression now confident and unwavering. ] The politics are nothing but another battleground. And just like with war the stakes are high, life or death. And that is exactly why men like us do what we do. We fight, Silco. The moment we stop we enter to our graves.
[He considered for a long moment, though the explanation needed limited thought. He could understand the the sentiment; taking on a title that others deemed repulsive, wrapping oneself in that identity so that it became armour rather than weakness. It seemed they both readily came to a point in their lives where the embraced the choice that would set them free to choose their own paths towards the golden light that Richard was so fond of seeking as a salvation.
In order to thrive, they had to kill the weakness inside of themselves, to make that decision to keep fighting no matter the cost. And this man, this Henry who had once been King, had given that life-altering choice that he had once faced with him. Die under the weight, or fight for something worth believing, worth striving for.]
And you embraced what he called you on his corpse. Those of us who wish to be more have to step beyond the titles laid over us to become something more.
[He met Richard's gaze evenly, and the corner of his lips twitched at the truthful words. A war of words and ambition was as dangerous as a war of ones fists or weapons.] We all wage our own wars for our own ambition and perhaps... [He reached out and ran the back of his knuckles against Richard's smooth cheek.] to prove them all that those titles bestowed on us like a curse are little more than motivation to put a boot on their throats. The fear of death should never stop us from accomplishing what we need to.
[Henry truly had sealed both of their fates that night when he had spoken out the prophecy. But he hadn't been the first one to curse him so, no. Both his mother and Joan had cursed him similarly his entire life. And neither had Henry been the one to awaken the demon within him. No, the previous king had murdered his heart, left it to rot in the ever bleeding wound that rekt of darkness and death. Richard had navigated in that frozen state for so many years until someone else came along, dug up the corpse and brought it back to alive with the words of magic.
At first Richard thinks of leaving Silco with the misconception. But allowing it would only twist the events of that night further, it would mix his hatred and shame together with his ambition.]
...Nay. It wasn't him who awoke the demon and made me accept my true nature. [Buckingham had dragged him out of his shell and forced him to admit his darkest desire as he was screaming and kicking. Yet another night which's events he could not be certain. There had been tears, blood and pain -- that much he knew. But at what point had the reality began and dream ended? That he did not know.
But it was all thanks to that night that they were here now together. Without his kingmaker's persistence and ability to see Richard beyond the body, he would have died a long time ago without ever knowing the touch of another person. Without Buckingham he would not have accepted Silco.
He briefly closes his eyes, focusing on the slow and gentle drag of bony knuckle against his cheek. He nearly leans into it but stops himself. He loathes the way Silco could just disarm him and make him weak with just simple touch.]
What of you Silco? [Richard opens his eyes again, staring right into his lover's mismatched eyes.] Where does your current fight take you? What is the the future that you seek?
[Silco considered that, even if the scars of that first love were plain as day on Richard's body, the weight it had placed upon the younger man. The title had hung about Richard's neck for a long time, and he was reminded of only one person that had risen in conversation who had allowed Richard to fully embrace who he could be under that title.
Buckingham. Richard's other half. Richard's soul mate. Richard's... waste of space conniving jealous little man operating from the shadows.
Unfortunately, their similarities were enough that even Silco was aware of them, but he prided himself on not being such a prick when it came to his relationship with Richard. After all, they seemed to enjoy one another's company in more than sex, and their plotting and scheming antics were more foreplay than something that they currently put in motion.]
Your other half then. [Silco decided to not put a name to the title. He wouldn't give the other man that kind of humanization on purpose.] And now you have found your footing again on your own here without him. Embracing who you are is entirely personal once one has the confidence.
[His knuckles drew down and he was perceptive enough to note the aborted idea of leaning in. His hand turned over once it reached Richard's jawline, sliding his palm and fingers up along that smooth cheek. He leaned forward, closing the distance between them, intent to disarm his lover after they had spent so much time apart with barely fleeting encounters. He nudged the tips of their noses together.]
I fight for control; if there is a method to control this place, it means stability and progress. We can remove our enemies with blade and whatever weapon and make certain they cannot return. We can stop those from challenging even arriving and disrupting things. [He paused, thumb stroking over Richard's cheek.] I thought... my daughter would take the reigns of my legacy if I brought this place to heel, but her interest in that has... waned. The future appears to be something I must consider.
Hm. [Richard stays quiet, merely humming softly as he listened to Silco's estimation on his other half. Was that contempt he was sensing behind his lover's words? Richard knew that Buckingham was hardly the most likeable personality, not with his shameless ambitions, bold moves and sharp tongue that would turn lies into truth -- that would bring the crown down on a demon's head. But neither of his lovers had met each other -- nor did they pose a danger or anything to like to one another.
But he considers Silco's words. Had he truly found a way to stand on his own? The nightmares and Joan would have him think differently. Was he not still leaning on the crutch provided by someone else? Expecting someone else to chase away the monsters lurking in his and guiding him out of the forest.
But speaking of the crutch? Richard stays still as Silco closes the gap between them. He can feel the hot air of his lover's breath tingling against his face. He remembers the conversations they had all those months ago, when they were still strangers to each other. They had talked about legacies, the power and control, the empire of dirt. And Jinx, of course. As long as she was in picture Richard knew that he and Silco could never truly share same goal, and that in the end the two monsters would have to turn on against one another.
But now there was a 'we' present in his words.
And perhaps for the first time he does not reciprocate the closeness nor lean into his lover's touch, despite his body screaming him to do so. Instead he turns his head away and withdraws so that his back presses against the bench. He continues to stay quiet for another moment, Joan's previous curses echoing in the back of his mind. 'You can't help but seek for it.' 'Do not expect for a happy ending.']
I see. [He says eventually with a deep sigh, his shoulders relaxing.] The time spent away from you must have shaped her thoughts, bringing new troubles to plague her mind. You need to be with her now more than ever.
[Richard's quiet hums and additions to conversation were hardly rare, least of all after their little debate. Often the younger man would withdraw and become insular and more often than not, Silco would allow that to happen. He remained a steady presence regardless, and he had learned how draw Richard back out to him little-by-little over the months that they had spent together.
No doubt the topic of the book revolving around Richard's religion remained a point of contention, but he was convinced that nothing in those words would move him to do more than scoff. And the topic of Richard's ascent to the crown was one that they had discussed, though perhaps he should lessen his rising dislike for this 'other half'. It wasn't as if the man was currently a threat to what they had.
No that threat remained his daughter who, by all measure, had completed an about face and was encouraging his relationship with Richard to flourish. His resistance was unfounded, based in fear of losing her. It was clearly a trap, a gotcha that she had set to remind him of his priorities.
He slowly pulled back when Richard did not reciprocate his affections, which was... odd. That was unusual, given his lover's craving for physical attention. The only time it failed to move the younger man was when they were actively in disagreement, so this cold shoulder briefly flummoxed him. He sat back and considered, his gaze watching the younger man next to him as he mulled over the list of possibilities based on the topics and their exchanges, picking them apart each word at a time.]
So it would seem. She had progressed, become and seemingly abandoned being a revolutionary force. This place had decided to bring in more troubles from my world for her to tangle with. [His arm stretched across the back of the pew so he could settle his hand at the back of Richard's neck, trying again to draw his lover out with physical affection.] However, I am here with you tonight, if you wish me to stay with you. It's been... some time since we spent time together.
[There was no any further attempt to pull away or create distance between them on Richard's part. He stayed seated and allowed the touch on his neck, inhaling deep through his nose he closed his eyes for a brief moment and granted himself a brief moment of indulgence.
He hadn't seen Jinx since her return, but he had eyed the post she had made on the network upon her arrival. It had been confusing and mindless, but that was the the norm for Jinx as far as Richard was concerned. So, to his eyes there hadn't been any major differences in the girl's behavior, so he remained oblivious to her changed stance when it came to their relationship. Richard was partly waiting for the other shoe to drop and her to start her usual harassment campaign against him. But if she truly had 'outgrown' her father's cause... then that would no doubt cause a ripple between the father and daughter duo. All the more reason for Silco to stay with her. The man would need to ensure that his empire would not perish and turn into dirt.
And yet he was here with him, just like the man had said. Whitey might have led him here but he had followed the boar out of his free will, choosing to engage in conversation with him despite the distraught daughter waiting at home. His chest tightens in his chest under the ice.
[If Richard wouldn't come to him, Silco would move to him now that he noted his hand had not been rejected. He shifted closer on the pew, sliding his arm across Richard's shoulders and moving to draw the younger man against his side as he leaned his face in to press his lips lightly Richard's temple.
Perhaps he had been reluctant to venture out tonight, but now that he was here, he found himself reluctant to leave. Since Jinx had returned, he had not made much time for Richard, prioritizing his daughter given her current state of mind. Yet, he breathed in the familiarity of his lover's scent, he relaxed subtly.]
I'm not sure, but anything with you suits me fine. How have you been sleeping these last weeks, hmm?
[He made a point of adding a small kiss to Richard's temple after the question. Neither of them were particularly good sleepers, yet they had managed to find an odd solace of the activity together.]
I'll stay until morning, if you like. We can stay here or go elsewhere. Your choice.
[And just like that, Silco had worked his magic once again. Because the moment Richard felt the lips press against his temple through his dark hair and inhale his scent, he knew he had no other choice than to let go. Once again he found himself disarmed in his lover's hands and forced to let go of the worries, anxieties and what not that were raising a storm within him.
A quiet sigh leaves from his lips and he presses his eyelids close again. The ice was thawed, revealing an aching heart underneath the frost -- yearning for the closeness and affection. Richard leaned in against his lover's chest, head resting on the man's collar. There might never be love between them and this is might as well be as far as they ever go... But right now that was more than enough. As long as they could stay close here like this.
How had he been sleeping? Well, Silco most likely knew the answer to that: badly. It had taken him some time to get used to the empty space in his bed and lack of the warmth. Sleeping alone had gotten easier, yes, but the nights were still full of terrors for him. The curse would come back to him, forcing its way through the small cracks of his mind and kept him awake until the morning rays.]
I'm tired, Silco. [Tired of being afraid, tired of Joan and her curses, tired of pretending to be something that he is not. Tired of being alone.] Just tired..
[It was easy to experience the surrender, and as always, persistence could be the key to winning his lover over, especially after time apart. His arm draped more around Richard's narrow but muscled shoulders as his lover leaned against his chest, and he tipped his head up as he felt that head to his collar. He made a point of resting his chin on the crown of his lover's head, sigh quietly leaving his nose.
He hadn't realized how tense he had been until that moment when he too surrendered into the closeness. There was always the linger concern for rejection or that Richard might choose to physically remove him. Now, he shifted to spread his legs with feet flat on the floor and his blue eye closed as he basked in the closeness. He could be a different form of himself with Richard, unburdened by most concerns.]
Mmm, I suspected as much. [And he knew it wasn't just physically tired. They both wore the necessary masks to the world, claiming their titles like a curse against the world. He tipped his chin and kissed the top of Richard's head.] We should try to rest. It's always... easier with you.
[A testament to the trust he could place in his lover. Sleep was one of the most intimate gestures in his mind, when one was in a prolonged state of vulnerability.]
[It is a little awkward position to be in with Richard leaned his upper body against Silco, head resting right below the man's chin. The benches were narrow, clearly not planned for two people to engage in this kind of closeness comfortably. But Richard found himself less caring about that. He could feel the storm of emotions to die out within his mind just as his breath calmed down in his lover's arms.
While he knew that they could not possibly stay here in the church for long and risk the keeper to find them like this. But rest sounded way too tempting for him to refuse, especially now that he felt exhausted. As if he had just came back from a long and taxing battle. His body relaxed further, going almost lax against the older man.]
..I know that the God isn't here. I knew it the moment I arrived to this world. He would never choose to shine His light on me. [He's not exactly sure why he whispered this confession, or whether it was more aimed to Silco or to himself. It was an admittance that none of this was real, that he was very well aware that he was still clinging on his own chains of oppression, rattling them in desperation in the slight case that just maybe the God would see him. All these attempts to deceive and play the role of a proper Christian while hiding his true nature once again, all for someone who had forsaken him a long time ago. But at the same it was an acknowledgement that he would not stop chasing after what he desired, no matter how much pain it might bring.
From the corner of his eye he can see the familiar white transient shape looming above them. Though for once, he could not feel the calamity from Joan. He could not see the expression on her face but at the same time he wasn't really interested to look up, either.]
You were right. [This time the words were not aimed at either of them but to the ghost. As much as Richard hated to admit it, the truth was that Joan was right most of times. She knew him better than anyone else, had always known. She had seen right into his dark heart ever since he was a child.
He could not help but remember the last night he spent with Buckingham. It had been the night before the hunt and defamation of his nephews. The crown would be theirs and they would no longer need to show the proof of their covenant. But at the same time, they had been unable to let go of themselves. And Richard finds himself from repeating the same words that his kingmaker had said to him back then:]
Our pact is not sex alone. So... just be with me, Silco.
[He doubted that the brute had thought of making this place more comfortable to limit both visitors and squatters. The pew was fine to sit on short-term, but Silco had not come equipped with appropriate physical padding for a long-term stay. Yet, he was hesitant to leave and suggest comfortable lodging, not with Richard holding onto him and this place apparently holding enough meaning to require such celebratory decorations in the first place.
He turned his head at the whispered words, offering a soft hum of acknowledgement and feeling no urge to add to it. He expected that was a private thought that had slipped passed those lips. Perhaps Richard thought that saying them outloud to encourage the younger man to even believe them one day. Yet, as if to punctuate that this Light not shining by a God wasn't important, he tipped his head to plant a kiss on his lover's crown. There was no God; there were just people with enough ego to think they were one and lord it over the rest of them.]
I usually am right. It's a gift and a curse. [He, of course, couldn't see Joan and had no idea those words were aimed at her and not an observance of the two of them.
He suddenly sat forward, rolling his narrow shoulders to slide out of his thick jacket and shook it out in front of him. He paused at the words regarding their pact, and he looked at Richard, surveying the younger man's expression even as the corner of his lips quirked in a smirk. He shifted up the pew so he could pull one leg up and let the other dangle off the side as he lay down and gestured for Richard to come and lay down upon him so he could use his jacket as a blanket to cover them both over.]
Oh, Richard, this has never been about just sex. I value your company and all of our interactions in whatever form they take. [He folded an arm under his head and regarded his lover, expression bemused as if he were stating the most obvious observance in the world.] I will stay with you all night, Richard. Come, let us rest.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
branchandroot
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-05 02:12 pm (UTC)It was a fact that neither one of them could entirely trust again. There was too much background, too many slights and betrayals, so they had to focus forward on their goals. In this way, Silco had always felt a connection to Richard that he hadn't felt with anyone else, not even his own daughter.
Yet his gaze moved from watching the back of Richard's head to look across the altar with all its little decorations and candles bathing the place in light. His fingers dragged over the spot between his lover's shoulder blades, and he considered the tale being woven for him. It was more details that he supposed he had given about his own lover.]
What betrayal did this person do against your person to provoke such a response? This is supposed to be a holy place according to you, and you killed a man under the eye of your God. That's... bold.
[He knew what it was like though, to wish to repeat that moment over and over again, to claim the victory and prove everyone who thought they could be redeemed or brought to heel wrong. He had drive the knife into Vander's back and then front, had looked into those gray eyes and felt a momentary heat when he knew that he had won, that he had overcome a greater enemy and completed his transformation to something more. No longer would he be that dirty little thing of the undercity.
Yet, he sighed from his nose as the same old tale was spoken of. He'd seen the crown and hadn't thought much of it, but he could tell that Richard was drive to achieve that.] And will you bring about a Hell to those that prevented and stood in your path from achieving this golden light? It seems to me that the higher in the political world one ventures, the more inherent dangers there are, but these knives are cloaked behind smiles and ambition. It seems you might be happy but walking into a larger fight at the same time.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-12 04:18 am (UTC)Even their journey's followed a similar path. A life overshadowed by oppressive power, choking them out and forcing them in the quiet and resigned role determined for them by nation. They both had found a dream -- which only was stolen away by a betrayal, leaving behind only a husk, a shadow of their former selves.
And now Silco was asking the story behind the betrayal that happened all those years ago, the event that had killed his previous, weak self. Richard eyes were focused on the altar, mind revisiting that evening. But strangely enough, he felt nothing. No panic, fear or pain -- just a distant recollection.]
..He called me a demon. [He answers after a brief silence. That's right, Henry had seen him for who he was and failed to love him. He had murdered his heart and Richard took his life. It had been inevitable.
Richard then turned his head to look into his lover's eyes, his own expression now confident and unwavering. ] The politics are nothing but another battleground. And just like with war the stakes are high, life or death. And that is exactly why men like us do what we do. We fight, Silco. The moment we stop we enter to our graves.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-12 06:13 am (UTC)In order to thrive, they had to kill the weakness inside of themselves, to make that decision to keep fighting no matter the cost. And this man, this Henry who had once been King, had given that life-altering choice that he had once faced with him. Die under the weight, or fight for something worth believing, worth striving for.]
And you embraced what he called you on his corpse. Those of us who wish to be more have to step beyond the titles laid over us to become something more.
[He met Richard's gaze evenly, and the corner of his lips twitched at the truthful words. A war of words and ambition was as dangerous as a war of ones fists or weapons.] We all wage our own wars for our own ambition and perhaps... [He reached out and ran the back of his knuckles against Richard's smooth cheek.] to prove them all that those titles bestowed on us like a curse are little more than motivation to put a boot on their throats. The fear of death should never stop us from accomplishing what we need to.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-15 02:52 am (UTC)At first Richard thinks of leaving Silco with the misconception. But allowing it would only twist the events of that night further, it would mix his hatred and shame together with his ambition.]
...Nay. It wasn't him who awoke the demon and made me accept my true nature. [Buckingham had dragged him out of his shell and forced him to admit his darkest desire as he was screaming and kicking. Yet another night which's events he could not be certain. There had been tears, blood and pain -- that much he knew. But at what point had the reality began and dream ended? That he did not know.
But it was all thanks to that night that they were here now together. Without his kingmaker's persistence and ability to see Richard beyond the body, he would have died a long time ago without ever knowing the touch of another person. Without Buckingham he would not have accepted Silco.
He briefly closes his eyes, focusing on the slow and gentle drag of bony knuckle against his cheek. He nearly leans into it but stops himself. He loathes the way Silco could just disarm him and make him weak with just simple touch.]
What of you Silco? [Richard opens his eyes again, staring right into his lover's mismatched eyes.] Where does your current fight take you? What is the the future that you seek?
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-15 07:41 pm (UTC)Buckingham. Richard's other half. Richard's soul mate. Richard's... waste of space conniving jealous little man operating from the shadows.
Unfortunately, their similarities were enough that even Silco was aware of them, but he prided himself on not being such a prick when it came to his relationship with Richard. After all, they seemed to enjoy one another's company in more than sex, and their plotting and scheming antics were more foreplay than something that they currently put in motion.]
Your other half then. [Silco decided to not put a name to the title. He wouldn't give the other man that kind of humanization on purpose.] And now you have found your footing again on your own here without him. Embracing who you are is entirely personal once one has the confidence.
[His knuckles drew down and he was perceptive enough to note the aborted idea of leaning in. His hand turned over once it reached Richard's jawline, sliding his palm and fingers up along that smooth cheek. He leaned forward, closing the distance between them, intent to disarm his lover after they had spent so much time apart with barely fleeting encounters. He nudged the tips of their noses together.]
I fight for control; if there is a method to control this place, it means stability and progress. We can remove our enemies with blade and whatever weapon and make certain they cannot return. We can stop those from challenging even arriving and disrupting things. [He paused, thumb stroking over Richard's cheek.] I thought... my daughter would take the reigns of my legacy if I brought this place to heel, but her interest in that has... waned. The future appears to be something I must consider.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-16 07:59 pm (UTC)But he considers Silco's words. Had he truly found a way to stand on his own? The nightmares and Joan would have him think differently. Was he not still leaning on the crutch provided by someone else? Expecting someone else to chase away the monsters lurking in his and guiding him out of the forest.
But speaking of the crutch? Richard stays still as Silco closes the gap between them. He can feel the hot air of his lover's breath tingling against his face. He remembers the conversations they had all those months ago, when they were still strangers to each other. They had talked about legacies, the power and control, the empire of dirt. And Jinx, of course. As long as she was in picture Richard knew that he and Silco could never truly share same goal, and that in the end the two monsters would have to turn on against one another.
But now there was a 'we' present in his words.
And perhaps for the first time he does not reciprocate the closeness nor lean into his lover's touch, despite his body screaming him to do so. Instead he turns his head away and withdraws so that his back presses against the bench. He continues to stay quiet for another moment, Joan's previous curses echoing in the back of his mind. 'You can't help but seek for it.' 'Do not expect for a happy ending.']
I see. [He says eventually with a deep sigh, his shoulders relaxing.] The time spent away from you must have shaped her thoughts, bringing new troubles to plague her mind. You need to be with her now more than ever.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-16 08:25 pm (UTC)No doubt the topic of the book revolving around Richard's religion remained a point of contention, but he was convinced that nothing in those words would move him to do more than scoff. And the topic of Richard's ascent to the crown was one that they had discussed, though perhaps he should lessen his rising dislike for this 'other half'. It wasn't as if the man was currently a threat to what they had.
No that threat remained his daughter who, by all measure, had completed an about face and was encouraging his relationship with Richard to flourish. His resistance was unfounded, based in fear of losing her. It was clearly a trap, a gotcha that she had set to remind him of his priorities.
He slowly pulled back when Richard did not reciprocate his affections, which was... odd. That was unusual, given his lover's craving for physical attention. The only time it failed to move the younger man was when they were actively in disagreement, so this cold shoulder briefly flummoxed him. He sat back and considered, his gaze watching the younger man next to him as he mulled over the list of possibilities based on the topics and their exchanges, picking them apart each word at a time.]
So it would seem. She had progressed, become and seemingly abandoned being a revolutionary force. This place had decided to bring in more troubles from my world for her to tangle with. [His arm stretched across the back of the pew so he could settle his hand at the back of Richard's neck, trying again to draw his lover out with physical affection.] However, I am here with you tonight, if you wish me to stay with you. It's been... some time since we spent time together.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-17 12:26 am (UTC)He hadn't seen Jinx since her return, but he had eyed the post she had made on the network upon her arrival. It had been confusing and mindless, but that was the the norm for Jinx as far as Richard was concerned. So, to his eyes there hadn't been any major differences in the girl's behavior, so he remained oblivious to her changed stance when it came to their relationship. Richard was partly waiting for the other shoe to drop and her to start her usual harassment campaign against him. But if she truly had 'outgrown' her father's cause... then that would no doubt cause a ripple between the father and daughter duo. All the more reason for Silco to stay with her. The man would need to ensure that his empire would not perish and turn into dirt.
And yet he was here with him, just like the man had said. Whitey might have led him here but he had followed the boar out of his free will, choosing to engage in conversation with him despite the distraught daughter waiting at home. His chest tightens in his chest under the ice.
What Richard wanted was clear. It always was.]
What do you wish to do, then?
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-17 01:55 am (UTC)Perhaps he had been reluctant to venture out tonight, but now that he was here, he found himself reluctant to leave. Since Jinx had returned, he had not made much time for Richard, prioritizing his daughter given her current state of mind. Yet, he breathed in the familiarity of his lover's scent, he relaxed subtly.]
I'm not sure, but anything with you suits me fine. How have you been sleeping these last weeks, hmm?
[He made a point of adding a small kiss to Richard's temple after the question. Neither of them were particularly good sleepers, yet they had managed to find an odd solace of the activity together.]
I'll stay until morning, if you like. We can stay here or go elsewhere. Your choice.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-17 02:46 am (UTC)A quiet sigh leaves from his lips and he presses his eyelids close again. The ice was thawed, revealing an aching heart underneath the frost -- yearning for the closeness and affection. Richard leaned in against his lover's chest, head resting on the man's collar. There might never be love between them and this is might as well be as far as they ever go... But right now that was more than enough. As long as they could stay close here like this.
How had he been sleeping? Well, Silco most likely knew the answer to that: badly. It had taken him some time to get used to the empty space in his bed and lack of the warmth. Sleeping alone had gotten easier, yes, but the nights were still full of terrors for him. The curse would come back to him, forcing its way through the small cracks of his mind and kept him awake until the morning rays.]
I'm tired, Silco. [Tired of being afraid, tired of Joan and her curses, tired of pretending to be something that he is not. Tired of being alone.] Just tired..
(no subject)
Date: 2025-02-17 03:01 am (UTC)He hadn't realized how tense he had been until that moment when he too surrendered into the closeness. There was always the linger concern for rejection or that Richard might choose to physically remove him. Now, he shifted to spread his legs with feet flat on the floor and his blue eye closed as he basked in the closeness. He could be a different form of himself with Richard, unburdened by most concerns.]
Mmm, I suspected as much. [And he knew it wasn't just physically tired. They both wore the necessary masks to the world, claiming their titles like a curse against the world. He tipped his chin and kissed the top of Richard's head.] We should try to rest. It's always... easier with you.
[A testament to the trust he could place in his lover. Sleep was one of the most intimate gestures in his mind, when one was in a prolonged state of vulnerability.]
wrap?
Date: 2025-02-20 02:13 pm (UTC)While he knew that they could not possibly stay here in the church for long and risk the keeper to find them like this. But rest sounded way too tempting for him to refuse, especially now that he felt exhausted. As if he had just came back from a long and taxing battle. His body relaxed further, going almost lax against the older man.]
..I know that the God isn't here. I knew it the moment I arrived to this world. He would never choose to shine His light on me. [He's not exactly sure why he whispered this confession, or whether it was more aimed to Silco or to himself. It was an admittance that none of this was real, that he was very well aware that he was still clinging on his own chains of oppression, rattling them in desperation in the slight case that just maybe the God would see him. All these attempts to deceive and play the role of a proper Christian while hiding his true nature once again, all for someone who had forsaken him a long time ago. But at the same it was an acknowledgement that he would not stop chasing after what he desired, no matter how much pain it might bring.
From the corner of his eye he can see the familiar white transient shape looming above them. Though for once, he could not feel the calamity from Joan. He could not see the expression on her face but at the same time he wasn't really interested to look up, either.]
You were right. [This time the words were not aimed at either of them but to the ghost. As much as Richard hated to admit it, the truth was that Joan was right most of times. She knew him better than anyone else, had always known. She had seen right into his dark heart ever since he was a child.
He could not help but remember the last night he spent with Buckingham. It had been the night before the hunt and defamation of his nephews. The crown would be theirs and they would no longer need to show the proof of their covenant. But at the same time, they had been unable to let go of themselves. And Richard finds himself from repeating the same words that his kingmaker had said to him back then:]
Our pact is not sex alone. So... just be with me, Silco.
u don't get to drop that on him and wrap :| he gets last word
Date: 2025-02-21 05:46 pm (UTC)He turned his head at the whispered words, offering a soft hum of acknowledgement and feeling no urge to add to it. He expected that was a private thought that had slipped passed those lips. Perhaps Richard thought that saying them outloud to encourage the younger man to even believe them one day. Yet, as if to punctuate that this Light not shining by a God wasn't important, he tipped his head to plant a kiss on his lover's crown. There was no God; there were just people with enough ego to think they were one and lord it over the rest of them.]
I usually am right. It's a gift and a curse. [He, of course, couldn't see Joan and had no idea those words were aimed at her and not an observance of the two of them.
He suddenly sat forward, rolling his narrow shoulders to slide out of his thick jacket and shook it out in front of him. He paused at the words regarding their pact, and he looked at Richard, surveying the younger man's expression even as the corner of his lips quirked in a smirk. He shifted up the pew so he could pull one leg up and let the other dangle off the side as he lay down and gestured for Richard to come and lay down upon him so he could use his jacket as a blanket to cover them both over.]
Oh, Richard, this has never been about just sex. I value your company and all of our interactions in whatever form they take. [He folded an arm under his head and regarded his lover, expression bemused as if he were stating the most obvious observance in the world.] I will stay with you all night, Richard. Come, let us rest.